How To Tap Into The Power Of Body Language While Networking
Networking without being mindful of your body language can make you seem as unaware as sending dozens of cold invites and sales pitches on LinkedIn.
“The relationship between body language and networking is symbiotic. Your body language can help you be perceived as confident, friendly, knowledgeable and more. It can also send the wrong message when aiming to build relationships with others,” says Karen Donaldson, best-selling author and celebrity communication and body language expert.
And being able to read body language is not a skill reserved for experts like Donaldson. While she can deconstruct it on a deep level, any human in any interaction is affected by it. “I wish all professionals knew that when it comes to networking, body language speaks volumes and that you do not have to be a body language expert to read someone else’s non-verbal cues. As humans, we can innately understand another person’s non-verbal gestures,” she says.
The good news is, it’s something that you can be intentional about and leverage to yield positive results in settings like networking opportunities. “Body language has the potential to make, break or strengthen relationships, and it’s something that’s truly within your control,” adds Donaldson. “When you decide to be intentional with your own body language you can stand out from the crowd at a networking event for all of the right reasons.”
Here’s how to project all the right non-verbal cues and avoid the wrong ones.
1. Smile at others
Smiling is key. “At a networking event, when someone smiles at us, we perceive it as an invitation to enter a conversation. When someone looks at us and then quickly looks away, most will take that as a signal that the person does not want to talk to them,” says Donaldson.
2. Pay attention to your feet
According to her, you also want to pay attention to the direction in which you point your toes, as it unconsciously expresses where you want to be at that very moment:
“If you are in a conversation with someone, you should be fully attentive, including with the positioning of your feet. Your toes should be directly pointed at them. If your toes are pointed in a different direction, it is a telltale sign that you don’t want to be there and would rather be where your toes are pointing.”
3. Master your handshake
Your handshake sets the stage for interaction.
“The handshake is more than a formality; it’s an opportunity to quickly build rapport with someone and showcase your level of confidence,” shares Donaldson.
While different handshake types send different messages, she recommends using the rapport-building shake for networking purposes. To master it, shake your interlocutor’s hand with your right hand while slightly touching their forearm with your left hand for about three seconds.
“It’s effective because it showcases that you are present, attentive, want to be there and are generally interested in the other person.”
4. Practice mirroring
Mirroring is another great body language habit to tap into while networking. “Mirroring is when you copy the non-verbal gestures of another person. For example, if they cross their legs, you do the same. If they laugh, you laugh as well,” explains Donaldson.
On a subconscious level, mirroring increases the comfort level of the other person with you. It reads, “you’re just like me,” she says. And, as humans, we have a natural preference for being around people we relate to. “Mirroring signals that you can relate to the other person, who they are and what they’re saying.”
5. Maintain appropriate physical distance
That being said, it’s important to keep a safe, comfortable social distance between you and whoever you are interacting with. Donaldson suggests making sure there are one to three meters of distance between you. Anything less and you’re moving into the other person’s personal (0.5 to 1 meters) or intimate (less than 0.5 meters) space — and sending the wrong message.
“This can make people uncomfortable around you and can be read as threatening, intimidating and aggressive – even without you uttering a word.”
6. Watch your stride
Your stride also matters. Aim for intentional, calm yet solid steps. Stand tall, keep your shoulders back and “walk as if your name was just announced,” recommends Donaldson. And avoid walking frantically at all costs.
“Stay away from being in a hurry, even if you are late. A hurried pace and short strides will have you appearing rushed, disorganized and lacking leadership qualities. When was the last time you saw a CEO rushing into a room even when they were late?”
7. Don’t fold your arms
Another thing to avoid is folding your arms across your chest. “It’s closed body language and can signal arrogance, disinterest and that you’re also hiding something,” says Donaldson.
8. Avoid looking away
Looking away is also a big no-no, as doing so in the middle of a conversation appears rude and signals disinterest — the last thing you want to project when aiming to build valuable new connections.
9. Keep your hands visible
Finally, it’s important to keep your hands in plain sight. Don’t hide them or put them in your pockets. Just keep them in front of your body. “Hiding the hands can signal that you don’t want to talk to someone, or that you don’t agree with what they are saying,” says Donaldson. On the other hand, showing your hands communicates transparency, which is key for building trust with a new connection.
